Posted in walt disney

End of the Road

A person’s purpose is the bright star in Christmas eve leading him to his destination. It serves as the basis for his decisions and sometimes principles in life. He builds his dreams around it.

Living without a purpose is like having the right sock on and losing the left one. It is like eating a fried chicken without the skin, or owning a key without knowing what it opens or unlocks. Purpose is the essence of why a person is even breathing. It gives every reason in the morning to wake up and every positive vibe to sleep at night looking forward for another chance in the next day.

If you like to build your own house in the future for your family, you start picturing that now. You study hard in school to earn your degree. And after college you get a job and be good at it. Save some money until you have enough to have that house. But the world isn’t that simple. You might fail subjects and delay your graduation and end up with a crappy boss who gives short salary than what you actually deserve, until you end up renting a unit in a poor condominium with your wife and crying one year old baby.

You should never give up on your dreams, or your purpose. Be a man full of hope and possibilities. Strive harder. Give more sweat. If you do not serve your purpose, why are you even here? What are you doing with your life? Where are you going?

Posted in primrose saddle

In Time

The past week has been a constant fight with my girlfriend. She came home for a short vacation since it is the Holy Week. Schools and works were in a holiday. I thought this would finally be our time together. Seeing each other only once a month gets me really lonely so when I knew she’d be coming home even for only a few days I got syched!

But all we do is fight and hurt each other. I have these things I wanted to do during her stay. But I did not quite noted that she was visiting not only me but her family too. I forgot the fact that she probably also missed them as she was away for a time.

When she was here, she will always ask me to tag along with her family’s activities and out-of-towns and I would gladly join them. I love her family! They are nice, accomodating and fun. I was really happy to spend time with them, with her. However, I always got this want to have her with me – alone. I want us to be together just the two of us and so far we did not do that. We only get to see each other when I came to their family gatherings. I really do not have anything against it except that my clingy side wanted more, more of us alone together. Which is difficult since she feel obliged to be with her family always which in return makes things difficult for me and that is why I get mad.

I tend to be selfish. There are times I wanted to have her for me only, not considering that some people need her too. She then became hopeless and sad since she cannot give the more time that I demand. Her supposed to be relaxing vacation from school only got her stressed out because of my attitude. I disregarded that she has responsibilities with her family and that means less baby time for me. Being the arrogant that I am, although I understand her I still chose to ignore her reasons and focused on what I want. That’s why we fought a lot.

She cried. I hid my tears. She screamed. I replied. She said she’d leave me because she does not know how to juggle me along with all the other things she prioritizes. I paused. I cannot lose someone just because I love myself too much. That’s not right. I cannot lose her just because I am being needy. I hugged her, she clinged for a minute and then we knew we were okay.

Lesson learned from this emotional swings for the last week is to be more patient. I have to be more patient and wait for the time when she can finally go home to me. I will be here just in stand by until I get to be the “home”. I will wait for the time that I am no longer a tag-along but a part of the family. Maybe next time everyday will be my time.

Posted in pablo neruda

In My Dreams

Will it ever happen?

 

When I call you when you are with your friends, will you answer it right there?

When I asked you to tell me where you go, will you text me?

When we bump into people you know, will you finally introduce me even by name?

 

Will you ever be proud of me?

Will you tell people that you love me?

Will I?

Posted in charles dickens

Worst Hangover (#3)

First Part: Three Bottles of Beer, Six Shots of Tequila (#1)

Second Part: The Yellow Umbrella (#2)

And here is the Third Part:

 

 

Dina continued the remaining two blocks to her sister’s apartment. Her hair is dripping. She can feel her top getting tighter on her skin. A breeze blew on her direction which makes her shiver a bit. She gripped on the yellow umbrella and started thinking about Danny.

“How come I never noticed him before? He’s really nice to me. But I am still mad for what he did last night. And the guy is so arrogant! Is he crazy? Giving an umbrella to a stranger and just ran off like that?”

She remembered Jim.

“Oh my God! And Jim! This is so embarrassing! Should I answer his text? What would I say? Maybe he thinks I’m reckless and irresponsible! But to think of it… He came to my rescue. He took me home. It’s been three months. Maybe he love me still. Or not. Maybe he just felt obligated because of that conceited waiter!”

 

She rang the bell to her sister’s apartment. Tina answered then opened the door.

“Gosh! What happened to you? Why are you still wet when you have an umbrella? Come inside. You’ll be sick!”

“Oh now you’re concerned!”

Dina went inside while shrugging off her body from the chills outside. She put the umbrella on the side to let it dry.

“What are you talking about? Of course I care about my little sister. Wait, I’ll go get a towel.”

Tina came back immediately with a towel and some dry clothes.

“Change your clothes first before we eat. Alright?”

When she came back from the bathroom, the dining table is already set. She could smell roasted chicken and potatoes. Tina is now slicing the cake. Dina grabbed her and hugged her from behind.

“Thank you, Tins.”, and Dina is in her comfort zone again – beside her sister.

“Well, this is not for you. I thought Rob will come over for lunch. But he got an emergency on the clinic so he cancelled on me. Good thing you texted, at least there is someone who would eat all these!”, she was grinning.

“You know sometimes I think your kind but in a second you let me lose it.” She grabbed a chair and they sat down across each other to eat.

“What are sisters are for!”, Tina said while carefully arranging the cake on the side of her small dining table.

“Yeah right! Sisters never ditch each other!”, Dina said with her annoyed voice while picking up the chicken.

“Dina, are you mad at me? You said on your text that you’ll tell a story and that you are mad.”

“You did not come pick me up last night!”, she exclaimed feeling hurt.

“Pick you up where? I told you I have a meeting last night. I know I told you. What happened?”, Tina is now worried.

“Jim picked me up.” She whispered.

“Jim? As in your Jim? Your ex-boyfriend Jim?”

“Yes, the one and only.”

“Why did you call him? You could have called me still or Rob or better yet Mom! But to call Jim, that was pretty stupid you know.”

“Well. It was not my fault.”, she’s having her second wing now.

“What do you mean?”

“I was really drunk. So this arrogant waiter at the bar called him. He used my phone to call Jim. Actually, I am still having a hangover. My head hurts.”

“What waiter?”

“I do not know him. But he’s tall, dark skin, squared jaw and kinda cute.”

“Oh! Danny!”

“Yes, that’s the name. How did you know him?”

“You’ve been having this routine of getting drunk and careless for the past weeks. When I get to pick you up, he always helps me carry you to my car. He’s really nice you know. And hot!”

“How come I never noticed him before?”

“Maybe you were too occupied by yourself, Dina!” She laughed while giving her sister a slice of cake.

Dina took a bite. “You are the best cook in the world, Tins! Well, next to Mom.”

“What a compliment. Thank you. Eat some more.”

 

“Thanks for the lunch, Tins. I gotta go. I still have to go to work.”

“Yeah, but I suggest you go home first and make yourself presentable. Do you want me to drive you?”

“It’s okay. I’ll just walk. Anyway the raid stopped.”

“Okay. See you tomorrow?”

“Sure. Bye Tins.” She kissed her sister goodbye.

 

The sky is still gloomy. The wind is still cold. But it’s not pouring anymore so she just closed the umbrella that is now dry. She went home and changed to her usual work attire. She put on her old faded jeans and a plain white shirt. She also got her jacket and she put on her boots. Before she goes, she fixed her hair up on a ponytail.

Dina is an engineer. She is now working on this new project wherein she has to rehabilitate an old building to become a restaurant. She took her motorcycle from the condominium parking area and drove straight to the site.

She’s been driving this bike for two weeks now. And she’s finally getting the hang of it. She likes the air through her hair. And the rush she gets from the excitement of her new toy.

When she arrived, her staff was so busy. Everyone who sees her greets her. Everybody respects her.

She went to an old container van just near the entrance of the area which seems to be their site office. Her secretary immediately handed her a hard hat.

“Good afternoon, Ma’am. The lawyer called this morning asking for you. She said you should return her call as soon as possible.”

“What’s it about?”, Dina said while dropping her backpack and helmet on her table.

“She wants to get an update on the project. She’s not happy with our progress.”

“We are two weeks late from schedule. We could still keep up with the target deadline. Why does she keep over reacting. She’s more concerned that the owner of the restaurant.” She sounds exasperated.

She got her phone and called Chey.

 

“Good afternoon Attorney!”

“Hi Engineer. Where are you?”

“I’m here at the site. I’ve been here since this morning. I was just so busy that’s why I never got the chance to answer your call. What’s up?”

“The owner wants to get an update on the project. He wants to have it finished in a month.”

“One month? Is he crazy? We can’t do that. You are the lawyear, you should have told him that as per our contract, this project will be delivered in six months which gives me at least two more months to finish it.”

“Yes, but he needs it in a month. That is why he likes to talk to you.”

Dina is now frustrated. She got her hands clenched and brows crossed. She’s trying to keep her cool. She walks back and forth inside their small office. The other engineers stopped on their work and looked at each other, scared.

“Whatever. I’ll talk to him. When is he available? I still need to prepare and think about this.”

“He’s coming there. He wants to see what’s happening to his property.”

“He’s coming here now? Why?”

“It’s his restaurant. He can see it whenever he wants. Plus it’s about time you guys meet. Whatever you two agreed on, we will put it on paper. I’ll meet you there tomorrow. Dina, do not be mad at me. Both of us are working for him, me as his representative on his transactions and you to build him his restaurant. Bye.”, and she hang up.

 

Dina sat down on her chair. She’s nervous about the project. She knows she’s been out of her game lately, mainly because of her heartbreak. She’s not like this before. When she has something to do, she finishes it ahead of time. Now she’s facing a project which is delayed and with pushed down timeline.

“How can I finish this in one month when I am two weeks behind schedule? Is he crazy? Why is he suddenly changing the timeline? And what is the name of the owner? Gosh, I forgot. It was Chey who always talks to me on this stuff. Why is he interested now? He never comes here.”

Her secretary got her attention.

“Ma’am, Mr. Mayer is now approaching.”

“Mr. Who?”, she was still half focused from her own thoughts.

“The owner, Ma’am. His car is parked outside and will be here any minute now.”

“Oh. What’s his name again?”

And before the secretary could reply, a tall man with squared jaw opened the door.

“Good afternoon everyone.”, he greeted with a smile showing off his perfect set of white teeth.

 

“Oh my God. It’s him!”

Posted in primrose saddle

Six More 

Being in a long distance relationship is very difficult. You cannot talk constantly. You cannot see each other even on free days. So with every chance I can get to be with the one I love, I take it.

The thing is… I am not the only one. There is also a long distance relationship with the family. I understand that family time is very important. But girlfriend time should also be as important. Am I right?

Call me selfish, clingy and callous but I am just hoping for some quality time because I need it, our relationship needs it. I apologize and feel bad for feeling this way. It was never my attention to be like this. I am not asking for all of the time but maybe just a little bit.

I do not know what to do. When I blurted out how I feel, all I get is “you should be the one to understand me” and “you are making me feel guilty whenever I spend time with my family”. It is not like that. All I want is assurance that we can still be together. It is already awful that we have to make us a secret. That gives me no right in the picture.

I really understand the situation. I am just the worst person in the world to love.

Six more years of long distance… Can we make it?

Posted in primrose saddle

When I’m 80

One of my greatest fears is getting old. I am afraid to lose my strength, have poor eye sight and have wrinkles on my body. I am scared of not being able to do things I want to.

But whenever I think about us being together until our hair turns gray, my worries disappear. It is not so frightening anymore. I’d love to hold your rough hands and kiss your dry lips. I want us to sit side by side while we watch the sunrise by the beach.

I can picture myself in our house in the future. I will cook our food while you go set the table. You will drop me off at my office then you go to the hospital to do your rounds. And by the end of the day when we are both tired, we will sleep on one bed hugging each other until our eyes surrender with smiles on our faces. And on weekends, we take a break from work and spend time with our families. We will go to the church on Sundays and have dinner on our favorite restaurant, just the two of us.

I am so blessed to have someone like you, someone I feel secured and safe with and that is important in relationships. You make me strong and believe in myself. I am no longer in doubt because you make things possible. You made my dreams come true and more than that you give me what I need even though I do not deserve it.

Even before I ask for it you give it to me. I do not have to say it because you already know what I need and what I want. You spoil me with stuff just to make me smile. You would spend all the money in the world just to give me things. I do not know what I’ve done good in this world to still have you. I am just so blessed that you put up with me.

How I wish I could make you feel the same way. I hope I am loving you right because you are more than perfect. All I am praying is for you to be happy. I will spend every second giving you everything because baby you are my everything.

So no matter what the future holds I know I will be okay because I will have you with me.

Posted in pablo neruda

gravity

How can someone be so in love?

I am quite not sure if this is accurate

What do you call something that’s more than love?

Is it even possible to feel this way?

As if heart could explode with just a thought of you

You’re making me crazy, you are all I think about

I am in awe to have this pull even after all these years

Always close to you til my time runs out