It ruptures my heart whenever I hear my grandmother cry. I called her earlier. She sound okay at first but as we talked, her voice starts to crack. I know she was keeping her voice low to hold back the tears. But I can still feel her sob even over the phone. It is tear-jerking for me too. I hate it when I am the reason why she is lonely. She’s afraid that we won’t be able to see each other more often because I have to fly away. I am also frightened. She’s not getting any younger…. And I can’t finish that sentence. Her voice still lingers on my ear. How sad she is. How she’s not okay with everything that is happening recently. She’s old and she should be just relaxing and enjoying life. But she just can’t do that. That is unfair. I wish I could be an instant millionaire so she doesn’t have to worry about paying the bills and all life’s shit. I want her to be happy. That will make me happier – just to see her happy.